Of Children and Peasants – Part II

(To read Part I click here.)

Excerpt from “Anna Karenina Comes to America” by Leia Tolstaya*, Millerskaya Ltd., New York, 2009

Levina had thrown in her lot with the children for a day, thrilling in the physical labor of shoveling snow. “Hot chocolate with marshmallows for all if we reach the street by dark!” she had hollered.

On the skirts of her enthusiasm, the children had cleared the entire driveway. Levina had slept well that night, dreaming of leading the simple life of a child again. She was tired of intellectualizing all the time.

But waking up with her husband next to her, knowing all they shared in their happy responsibilities towards each other and their children, she also realized that the simple bliss of a childlike mental life was neither possible nor to be desired.

So she returned to the puzzle of how to get the children to work more efficiently while making it worth their while.

She had given them each their own room, thinking that naturally pride would cause them to care for their own space. If she told them to clean them, they would disappear for hours, without accomplishing anything that could be seen. They were so easily distracted.

“Give them a good education,” she had been advised by her elders.

That gave them even more to distract from their duties! Reading, writing stories, and illustrating could wile away the hours, as could chess games and backgammon.

All they wanted to do was have fun! She could not fault them in this, which was their natural inclination. She needed a better system, one which would work in accordance to their natures.

To be continued…

*Leia Tolstaya is a pen name for Elizabeth K. Miller, and as such her works fall under the same copyright.

Ordinary Time

Despite my desire to keep all the Christmas decorations up until January 6, my husband insisted that they come down today. Kevin went out and took down the outdoor lights and then brought from the garage all the boxes in which to put our indoor decorations.

“It’s too early! Look, I have proof!” I went over to our new Church Calendar and found nothing printed on January 6. Instead, Epiphany Sunday was written in. I saw that next Sunday started Ordinary Time, starting with the celebration of the Baptism of Our Lord.

“See, and it’s after sundown, so it’s okay,” said my husband.

Still, I felt depressed. I always feel this way when it comes time to take down the Christmas decorations.

“What’s wrong?” Kevin asked. And, as he has said many times since our First Christmas together, “Christmas only comes once a year. That’s why it is so special. It has to come to an end sometime.”

“But it’s the end of a celebration, and once it’s gone all that’s left is the bleakness and coldness of January”, I said, still moping.

My attitude continued as I put ornaments away, one by one, in a lackluster fashion. Most of our ornaments come in their own special boxes, and the task is enormous. Empty old boxes lay all around me. I found a little comfort in replacing some of the old boxes with newer ones.

We seemed to have found just about every ornament. Some little books were missing from our Nutcracker Advent calendar. They were in a hole in the bottom of the couch, where the remote control sometimes disappears to. (Kevin had seen them earlier, while searching for said remote.) When I find them, they will go into a little drawer in the dining room into which I squirrel late-found ornaments that turn up through the year.

I reluctantly helped him to drag the tree out the door. It was a really good tree and dropped few needles. He helped with the vacuuming and put the boxes away. After a dinner composed of leftovers, I dusted off the surfaces and replaced our picture frames. Suddenly I felt a whole lot better.

There is something about the term “Ordinary Time” that I do not like. But it is for the joy in ordinary time that Jesus came for us. As I settle into the new year, I will take comfort in the relative peace that comes during this quiet time of the year.

Painting: The Adoration of the Magi, 1385-88, Pinacoteca Nazionale, Siena

School’s No Vacation for this Mom!

The last two nights were spent at open school nights: one for the middle school, and one for the elementary grades. Getting to these mandatory meetings is quite an ordeal for our family. The teachers still give out homework, which must be done earlier than usual; dinner finished and cleaned up; the children all set for bed. My self-employed husband must brave the “rush hour” to get home “early” at 7:00. I kiss the children goodbye and, as soon as his car pulls in the driveway, I am out the door.

The first night I was fifteen minutes late. The baby was fussing and giving me trouble about going to bed at 6:55. I finally had her asleep and was able to leave at 7:15. It takes a half hour to get to the school, park the car, and walk to the auditorium.

When I opened the door, it was clear I was the latest one, and they were in the middle of the opening prayer. Mortified, I closed the door behind me as quietly as I could. I imagined several people giving me dirty looks. (Imagined or not, given a choice between several hundred parents staring at me and leaving the house with the baby crying, I’ll choose the former every time.)

The second night I left just five minutes earlier, but the traffic lights worked with me and, if I had not gotten stuck waiting for a long train, I would have made it on time. Still, at 7:35, people had not yet sat themselves down, so I was okay. I made polite chit-cat with a school board member. “This must be like a vacation for you,” she commented, referring to my days with the kids in school.

“Believe it or not,” I told her, “I had more free time when all the kids were home for the summer!”

How quickly we all forget how much attention a baby needs the first few years of life. The active ones cannot be left alone for a second! I myself am guilty of forgetting this, as I have sometimes wondered why friends neglected to call for long periods of time after having a baby.

I go through my day logistically mapping every step in front of me. In the morning, I ask myself what chores I can accomplish with the baby with me. Today we ate breakfast together and went food shopping.

Because I cannot fit all our family’s food in one cart, I go through the store once, load up the car with the non-perishables; then go to the dairy and meats for a second run. The cashiers who are unfamiliar with me always make a funny comment when seeing me on their line for the second time. “Forget a few things?” When the baby fusses on the cashier line, I give her my cell phone and she happily pretends to talk to her daddy.

When we got back, I had to repeatedly place her in the farthest part of the living room away from the front door, then run to my car to get a few bags before she could get to the front door. A few times, she beat me to it, and I had to coax her away from the screen door so I could open it. After repeating this several times, I finally had the groceries loaded onto the kitchen table. I put her in the high chair with a banana while I quickly put the groceries away. Several times I had to stop what I was doing to rinse off the banana, which she kept throwing on the floor. Then I sat with her for my own lunch.

Finally, nap time. I am religious with our 12 to 2 nap time. I nurse her, put her down, and she is out. I think God made babies need naps because he knew mommies needed them to. This is the only time I have to myself until midnight.

Now I think to myself: what chores need to be done that I absolutely cannot accomplish with her with me? Sweeping or mopping the kitchen floor is always first on the list. Then bringing down the laundry. Today, for my major task I decided to clip the hedges in the front yard. I also chopped up the broccoli for dinner. I had a few moments to check my email and put up a post that I had already prepared ahead of time. I try to have most of the housework and errands completed before the kids get home from school. This way I can give them my full attention for the duration of the day.

The baby wakes up, we have a snack, and go out in the yard. At 3:20, we go out front and wait for the school bus. Although slightly fearful of the large yellow vehicle, her face lights up because she knows her siblings are home to play with her.

No homework this weekend – yay! We weeded and planted some bulbs together. We took the bunny for a walk around the yard. The kids played wiffle ball, until all the balls had landed in the pool. The baby played in the dirt, happy to get dirty and happier still to have a bath afterwards. It was another happy, productive, day in the life of this mom. I will sleep well tonight!

Pictured above: "The Menagerie" by Franz Sonderland